Foxglove's Formulary

Hey we don't live here anymore......

2007-09-09T23:28:00.001-04:00

We're very busy with Leela Frog, and work, and straightening out the house (baby proofing) and dealing with health problems of pets. We still keep in touch with Aughra- you all know where she's at, and sometimes we post at a blog just for Leela. But as far as Foxglove and her Formulary...

It's pretty much closed for business. thanks for all the memories folks-

feel free to stop by and visit Leela's blog- just remember, it's her website now, so it's more family friendly, like? Best wishes to all of you.

Brief Update

2007-07-14T10:14:00.000-04:00

Leela doing great.

She's 4 months old, now weighing 13 lbs and 10 oz and measuring 23" tall. She loves to play in her exersaucer which has 12.756 bells and whistles on it and is so entertaining I wish I had one to hang out in. She's also eating cereal, as you can see by the photo.

I've got a new job at new hospital- still psychiatric nursing, but a really nice hospital. They've been listed on the "best places to work" lists in our area several times- all the nurses I work with are really nice and everyone loves their jobs. It's a really nice change. I'm very happy there- it's just hard cause I miss seeing my Bug and my Leela!

Multimedia message

2007-05-26T13:42:00.001-04:00

Hands Taste Good.

2007-05-26T10:27:00.001-04:00

Leela's Day

2007-05-19T17:21:00.001-04:00

5:15 pm. After hours of freaking out. Sleep is her enemy.

and then...

5:20 pm. A solid 5 minutes of sleep and she's ready for more. I am ready for the sleep!

Leela Wears Jeans

2007-05-12T09:38:00.000-04:00

I've given up on shopping for myself as I still look pregnant, so I'm focusing on Leela. She however, still hates when clothes are pulled over her head. We're working on it.

This shirt (actually it's a onesie) was gotten for her from one of Bug's coworkers, who has immaculate taste in baby shopping. She wants to do personal shopping for people as a job, instead of her soul sucking job she has now. As soon as I become insanely wealthy, I will hire her.

Leela Frog Update

2007-05-04T17:45:00.001-04:00

It's happy baby. Her test went great. She was very brave. She'll be taking antibiotics daily to make sure she doesn't get another UTI...

Leela Gets Parole!

2007-04-25T18:16:00.000-04:00

My little Leela Frog was paroled from pediatric unit on Sunday night. She's doing much better now at home, getting her yummy creamsicle flavored amoxicillin twice a day and showing off her tough girl bruises from all the needle sticks it took to start her IV. They eventually ended up putting in her foot. Poor Leela.

Next week she has to have a Voiding Cystourethogram to see if she has this condition that will lead to more UTIs and possibly pylonephritis, which is way sucky and we don't want. So the Leela Frog has to get another catheter on Tuesday. Foxglove will have ativan.

Leela wants to thank everyone for their get well wishes, especially Osbasso, who kindly let people know what was going on and got her more get well wishes than my blog alone would've. They really helped, so thank you everyone.

Leela in Hospital!

2007-04-18T15:56:00.001-04:00

She had a fever of 103.6 this morning. She has since had a spinal tap, blood and urine cultures, and a urinalysis. She will be in the hospital for at least one week. We don't know what kind of infection she has yet but we do know that it is not meningitis. She doesn't seem to realize she is sick, she is still happy and sweet and alert. Please send her get well messages

Update: Leela has a UTI. SHe is getting antibiotics 4 times a day by IV. Her fever has been down for 24 hours. We're hoping to go home early next week. She is getting a new IV put in right now and it's making her cry a lot. Please send her get well messages!

An actual post

2007-04-10T02:51:00.001-04:00

Leela Frog loves her Binky. She's very fickle though as each day it's different one that soothes. This is Soothie from the hospital. She also loves Avent and Mam.

Ok, I still have troubles with the new blogger. It took me 20 minutes to log in to leave a post on My Darling Aughra's blog, and I'm also missing my delete key which makes typing kind of a bitch. Leela is sleeping right now- I have about 150 photos which I'll eventually load to flickr, I just feel weird about having them by my HNTs, since my entire family will likely try to go look at the Leela pictures and I don't want to deal with them looking at those. Leela now weighs 8lb 6oz, which is what Aughra's kids were in utero. She's dainty.

Being a mom is weird- I still don't feel like a mother exactly- though I don't know what it feels like so maybe I do. I know that me and Bug love her more than anything ever.

We went into the hospital on March 6th at about 10 am so I could get my amniocentesis to see if Leela's lungs were ready for her to come out, since she was only 38 weeks. The test came back good, so we got ready for surgery at about 7:15. My OB was there, as well as the nurse midwife from the practice who is absolutely wonderful= she spent so much time listening to me cry about the back pain and how scared I was to be a mom, and she was incredibly supportive. The day Leela was born she wasn't even on call, but she came in to be there for her birth anyway, which I think is pretty damn awesome. (Thanks Cris!) They brought me into the OR, gave me my spinal block, (they numbed me first which I appreciated) and then I lay down and waited for the numbing to set in. I was scared it wouldn't work and I'd feel slicing. Bug came in and sat behind my head as I literally sprayed bright yellow vomit during the entire process. When they told me they had her head out I cried "Yay! I'm not pregnant anymore!" My OB pointed out that I was still a little pregnant, but then they pulled the Leela out (no pain- the "pressure" I'd been told to expect just felt like I was wiggling my hips back and forth, like dancing) and lifted her up over me- and some ick dripped on me. She was funny looking. Then they sewed me back up, the anesthesiologist (also awesome) doped me a little more, and the next thing I knew Iw as in recovery and Bug was wheeling Leela in on her little cart.

I sweat more from puking than I did when I was a senior in high school and missed the required biannual mile run and had to a make up run in 99 degrees with 98% humidity. I also got a morphine PCA. That was neat. Bug and I roomed in with Leela, and he slept on the recliny chair. We had absolutely no idea what to do with her. We kept waiting for someone to give us instructions. She was sweet and didn't cry that much. I kept hitting my PCA button. It's like Jeopardy! "What is I AM IN A LOT OF PAIN NOW?". The next day the pain was much better, and they took away my morphine and gave me percocet and motrin. I was also happy to see that my massive belly had shrunk a great deal.

I will write more about Leela soon- the hospital stay was great, the nurses were all wonderful and the room was very nice- super sweet marble bathroom. It's now 3:37 AM and Leela is sleeping, so I should too.

Also- Bug is the greatest dad ever. He's super involved and supportive. The only way he could be better would be if he could lactate.

Smiling

2007-04-06T09:24:00.001-04:00

Happy Leela Frog

Leela in spots

2007-03-14T19:12:00.001-04:00

Half Nekkid Mama and Baby

Foxglove Has Baby- pregnancy finally over

2007-03-11T23:37:00.000-04:00

Leela born at 7:53 pm on March 6th. She weighed 6 lb and 13 oz and was 19 inches long. Now she is sitting with Bug watching the History channel. Feeding time starts in a few minutes....
"

new blogger is confusing for me.

Dogs like belly.

2007-02-11T19:28:00.000-05:00

Dog preferred location. Think Daisy plotting destruction with Froglet. That's huge purple bump thing.

Still pregnant. And HUGE.

2007-02-11T17:58:00.000-05:00

Big Big Big Big Big Big

Kidney issues. Continued.

2007-01-11T16:10:00.000-05:00

Most current threat from OB and urologist. The stent. this is the stent and some frightening information about it. Note how it looks like a giant bendy straw. Try to imagine how badly I don't want this jammed up my urethra, through my bladder, and into my kidney.

10 weeks to go. 10 weeks. 10 weeks. And remember, Elexa condoms are crap. They get you pregnant and lead to kidney stones. (I can't prove the last part but I think it's true.)

Send Aughra lots of love and support for dealing with me on a daily basis. The girl has the patience of a saint. Seriously.

Brief Foray Back into the Land Of HNT

2006-12-13T22:07:00.000-05:00

Yes, I'm almost 7 months gone now. No, people on the street, I am not due any day, but thanks for the ego boost. Daisy, as seen in the photo, is wearing a Generation X onesie, courtesy of my long time friend Patsy, and a pair of blue satin panties with black lace that I used to fit in. Why, you ask, is Daisy dressed like Courtney Love? Because she's in pseudo heat again, and has her period. Yay. So we practiced putting clothing on squirmy baby (ok dog) and then watching her try to pull them off. Surely authentic practice. Go see the King of HNT, Mr. Osbasso.

And what am I celebrating? Why my tiny waistline, of course! You can see our Xmas wreath in the window, and our tree is not ready for display yet.

Happy HNT all!

Still recovering from kidney stone issues

2006-12-11T08:18:00.000-05:00

So I've got way too much time on my hands, much of which I've spent at places like this, further fueling my hatred of all things celebutard. So I got the brilliant idea to try and diagnose the bints as though they were patients. This is a first try, so it might be a little rough...

Patient is 20 year old Caucasian female, employed in 'entertainment industry', pt. has unknown number of previous psychiatric admissions and unspecified number of admissions for OD
Axis I- Polysubstance Abuse/Dependence w/physiological dependence. Psychotic D/O NOS (specifically delusions of grandeur), Anorexia nervosa, Impulse Control D/O
Axis II- Borderline Personality Disorder (pt has history of self mutilating behavior, destructive relationships, and highly attention seeking behavior)
Axis III- S/P wrist fracture, S/P multiple hospitalizations for "exhaustion", asthma
Axis IV- problems w/primary support system (specifically pt's mother), difficulties w/employers due to drug seeking behavior and drug using behavior
Axis V- 45

Insight: poor
Prognosis: guarded
recommendations: inpatient rehab, Zyprexa 10mg BID, Buspar 20mg QD, THERAPY

I miss work. Not so much all my patients, though I visited last Tuesday and a bunch of them were happy to see me "Foxglove! We heard you were very ill. Are you better? When are you coming back? We miss your jokes. How is the baby?" That made me smile. Also there were my two best girls, Belladonna (she wanted a poison name too) and Little Sis, who is also a faux redhead with freckles and blue eyes. I got lots of hugs and "we miss you"s. It was nice. Then the flank pain came back and I had to go home and collapse on couch.

Pregnancy has made me insane with regard to Xmas decoration. No, we don't have those inflatable yard things (though we do have neighbors that have 7, yes 7 in their yard) but I want more lights, dammit!!! And our pre-lit tree hasn't come from Home Depot yet. And Christmas is essentially being skipped this year as I am working the weekend before and on Christmas day, as is my mum, and my brother can't come down from Maine, and we're all basically just not bothering. Bug will be going over to my relatives' house though for some quality chow, as otherwise he doesn't get to eat.

Oh, and go do this as your good deed for the year!

I want to hang this on my wall.

2006-12-04T13:53:00.000-05:00

It's the Three Skanks of the Apocalypse." ( I can't remember where I first read that term, it might've been here.... This site also has very funny recaps of Nip/Tuck.)

Bug and my new addiction

2006-11-30T17:40:00.000-05:00

Webkinz. Specifically, our frog, Layne. He's named after a pet green tree frog I had received as a gift from an old boyfriend when I was 17. My frog was awesome, except that he kept killing his roommates. He barked really loud, and was of course named after the singer from AIC. But back to Webkinz...

Layne has his own room, with a special frog bed, a chair, his own game of "link'd" (generic connect 4) a basketball, a poster of the Kinz band (Layne loves music) and a fun little toy chair that drives around. He also has an outside playground where he has a lilypond, a gnome, and trampoline that he enjoys exercising on. We play games, particularly "Quizzys" which are sets of 50 questions broken into age groups- 5-7, 8-9. 10-12, and 13+. There's also the "all ages" category. It is fantastic for our egos to answer the easy questions but some of them were really hard! (detailed questions about reading music for example, which I know nothing about.) Of course I rock the health questions, and Bug and I both do really well on the Animals and Science sections. We earned about 2000 Kinzbucks which we then go and buy Layne things with. He loves pretzels and "buggy pie" which is like green jell-o with bugs in it, and he also enjoys dragon fruits. We bought him a cowboy shirt and jeans, and a pair of cowboy boots. We go to the arcade and play games, all in attempts to get more money to buy him more things. It's insane how addicted we both are to this game which is aimed at a demographic at best half our ages. My recommendation? Go buy a webkinz stuffed animal. Then log in and sign up (it's free) and prepare to stare like a zombie at the computer screen, waiting for words of praise from the stuffed animals virtual counterpart.

So, I've heard that for men, passing a kidney stone is like giving birth.

2006-11-28T00:12:00.000-05:00

So why the hell did I get one? I'm already scheduled to do that in March, remember? Kidney stones are fun. I woke up Sunday morning at 6 AM with excruciating pain in an area that had previously never had excruciating pain. Freaked, searched internet, got more freaked, broke down and called mom, who said to call my OB. Called, he called me back- "Don't go to work tonight. Sit around, rest, drink lots of fluids, and take some tylenol. If there's no improvement, call me back."

3 hours later I've called back, can barely stand and am on way with Bug to Sweet Valley Hospital (where I used to work). I'm thinking they're gonna tell me I'm just an insane hypochondriac, but instead they put me in a gown and start monitoring the Froglet and her condo (my uterus) cause apparently my uterus was all "irritable" which could have potentially caused preterm labor which at 24 weeks, would be B A D for the Froglet. But- luckily, things are ok, I am back home after spending a little more than 24 hours in the super sweet L&D part of the hospital (swank single room), and taking tons of painkillers and getting 10000000 IVs. I still have pain, but my Froglet is ok, and Bug took good care of me. I am out of work for at least the week, but am very grateful that my Froglet is ok. Here is the proof of the sweetest boy in the world-

Here is me trying to convince my girls at work that I'm ok

and here is me at 1:29 AM fully doped to the gills with Stadol, which I nicknamed "stay down" because it totally fucks you up. I still had pain, I just wasn't aware that it was mine.

This morning I felt a little better, then suddenly got the stabbing back pains again and was transported to the post partum unit where I had the most wonderful nurse ever, Chrissy, who took amazing care of me. Even when the Demerol 50mg didn't do crap and after I puked 12,000 times from the percocet, she never got annoyed with me. She was awesome. Bug came to take care of me at 11. My mom couldn't come because she felt helpless that her little girl (yeah me, what of it?) and her granddaughter were suffering and she couldn't help and she has to get another mammography tomorrow (remember she was diagnosed with breast cancer in May 2004 and was treated successfullly and has an excellent prognosis but is understandably nervous as hell before the test, so say some prayers for my mommy, OK?) so I just kept her updated over the phone. I've been home since 9 pm (it's 12:32) and have taken one percocet and HAVEN'T EVEN DRY HEAVED! So, hopefully recovery will proceed well.

Aughra of course, was supportive and sent me messages about that idiot bint I loathe to try and cheer me up.

But I'm home now, and better. But hugely bloated. Like, wow. So- moral of the story. If you get a kidney stone? Try jumping off something really really high. Cause it hurts. But if you could inflict them at will? They'd be awesome weapons.

The official Pregnancy Photo.

2006-11-20T13:27:00.000-05:00

I was tired, so I agreed to a few photos. This one is ..acceptable... I guess. I hated going to Flickr though and seeing previous HNTs and stuff where I was thin. Sigh. This is 22 weeks, almost 23. Aughra says "wait till January and people will start asking if you're having twins." I might have to go on maternity leave early so I don't commit mass murder. I don't think "but I was hormonal and depressed" will have the get out of jail power I'll need...

Oh and I found this photo-

which reminded me of this one we took. If only I could still get my corset on.

Thanks for all the Masculine Thoughts

2006-11-07T18:50:00.000-05:00

But it didn't work.

It's gonna be a girl. Must discuss betrothal with Aughra with Rock there...

My camera phone refusing to send photos to blog so you'll just have to imagine that I'm still teensy weensy and skinny. (and I've hidden digi camera from Bug so no sneak shots of Fat Foxglove)

Sorry I've been away so long- tired, depressed etc. Did you know that not all the knocked up, even the happily married, living in a cute house with two awesome dogs and two awesome cats with supportive family are happy?! They can suffer from Pre Natal Depression? Yeah well it's true. Apparently if you have pre existing issues (ahem) you're more likely to get it. Add that to the fact that three people you know are trying DESPERATELY hard to get pregnant and you, um, weren't and you feel even crappier.

Work is ok, my new floor is super easy, the patients are much less acutely ill which is good, but more likely to have personality disorders and try to create drama, which is bad. I work with two lovely girls have made the transition easier. I spend a lot of time sleeping when I'm not at work. In fact..I don't even want to shop anymore. How frightening is that? Aughra gets a lot of frantic/whiny texts from me.

So I'll try to update more often, yeah the baby moves, yeah we think we have a name, and yeah I don't know how this labor thing is going to work cause I'm pretty sure they're going to expect me to actually be there and do the whole thing. I would've thought technology had gotten us past that but apparently not. Natural ? HA! I want whatever drugs they'll give me.

I'd start now if they'd let me...

mitosis exhausting.

2006-10-05T22:47:00.000-04:00

Aughra is super human and doesn't really get tired. I get tired thinking about doing things, much less actually doing them. Work is the same droning nightmare, not enough staff, too many patients, doctors not giving the right damned meds...the usual. Finding clothes to fit over my fatness depressing. Please remember when I was skinny, ok folks?

Ah. Those were the days. Now I encourage people to think "oh you look pregnant" because it beats looking fat again. Yeah, I'm shallow, I know.

Went shopping with Mom today. All the maternity clothes that are really pretty are really pretty because they're cashmere apparently. Or otherwise created out of some sort of magical fabric that costs $4000 a yard or something. Got a few items I can live with, and am deeply ashamed by just how comfortable maternity band on jeans is. It's like jeans- but sweatpants? Now I'm sad. And there is not anything in the house I want to snack on. What that might be, I'm not sure, I just know it's not here. Hmm.

Ultrasound returns

2006-09-24T01:53:00.000-04:00

August first. It's a dinosaur!

(It's the little blob in the left corner) Apparently there is a heartbeat and arm buds visible, at least that's what they told me then.

On August 30, however, we have more "baby like" than "prehistoric reptile-maybe bird" looking ... creature.

Next ultrasound not scheduled- Doctor visit on Tuesday, theoretically possible to find out sex at 15 weeks but easier later. I have to get fetal echocardiogram at 20 weeks because the Effexor that keeps me from mass killing makes the doctors a little tetchy. They anticipate no problems.

Incidentally- we're praying for a boy. Why? Because I know what I was like and I can't deal with it. The fact that my mom didn't kill me at some point between the ages of 14- 22 is a testament to either her strength, or her masochism. I deserved it. I was a nightmare.

So, yeah, boy. Send masculine fetal thoughts this way, eh?

Dogs and food

2006-08-26T13:06:00.000-04:00

Aughra's dogs, begging for Chinese food.

My dogs and Simon the Cat begging for pizza. Note similarities... Photos taken 5 minutes apart.

Some days ok...

2006-08-22T21:11:00.000-04:00

The good life.

Work brings new and fun developments.

2006-08-10T11:46:00.000-04:00

Our Hospital, Sweet Valley Psych, is actually owned by the county, but operated by Satan! I can't link to the actual company because it identifies my hospital and these people are evil fuckers. They cut staff- took away our attendants- so that we have usually 5 licensed people, like 4 RNs and one LPN (we end up tripping over each other- I usually end up doing like 4 charts, which is barely a reason to come in) and 2 attendants, 3 if we have a CO. So- patient attacks? Increasing because they're no fools and can easily see the lack of Big Strong Guys Likely to Stop Them from Killing Someone. So if we're really, really lucky? We get 2 guys. So when one inevitably goes on dinner break, we've got one guy on a floor with 20 acutely psychotic patients (who you might remember are not being medicated thanks to Dr. Cruise who doesn't believe in tranquilizers) whose job it is to keep all 20 patients safe, himself safe, and the nurses. Super fair!

And now- they're randomly reassigning staff. On my unit they have taken 2 RN's who have been there on that unit for 14 and 21 years respectively, and transferred them to other units. They transferred me as well. I cried. As of September 3 the "New STaffing Pattern" is 2 RNs and 2 LPNs and 3 attendants. That's on my floor. My current floor. My new floor? 24 patients? 2 attendants if I'm lucky.

Devastated. The morale in our hospital is now so low you'd need the people from Jurassic Park to dig it up. People walk around like zombies. Our union (and the attendants' union which got totally screwed into a surprise vote to extend their contract and essentially fuck them for the next 3 years) are planning Class Action lawsuit.

I'm not optimistic. I know it's lame that the nurses at my job are my only real friends (that I see in person) but they are. The people I work with are like my extended family. And I don't want to be taken away from them. For lots of reasons.

This is why no HNTs, no random funny crap., Foxglove is miserable.

But- here is an old picture of me being skinny and happy. (note: it's from January) And probably the last smiling Fox picture for awhile....

Just gets better and better

2006-08-06T23:46:00.000-04:00

Screw it.

Bedlam continued!

2006-07-29T10:26:00.000-04:00

last night?

Hell. We had to give 4 STAT IMs. (well actually 12 injections cause each is 3- Haldol 5mg, ATIVAN 2mg - it's ok when they're trying to kill us apparently, and we can bully the new residents- and 50mg of Benadryl.)

The patients were lucky that I gave the injections though- because I rule at that. Quick dart motion. I'm like the goddess of IMs. Attendants marvel. "Wow. You're so fast- they go right in! If I ever have to get a shot, I want YOU to do it!" Except one guy, who thinks it scary, but he's a freak anyway.

And our Kabuki Man is back. He covers his entire body in Calamine lotion. That's why he's Kabuki man. Last time he was admitted the pharmacy RAN OUT OF IT, so often did the dude use it. So, being the sweet little thing I am, I went on my dinner break and bought 4 bottles at a convenience store so that he could continue to have it. And then last night, remembering me, he called me "you little lunatic bitch, I'll kill you!" Ah. So sweet.

This guy has total immunity from calling me whatever though, because he is actually very, very ill. So though I don't like it, I don't take it personal. Unless he hits me, cause he's like 6 feet and probably close to 300lbs, but my steadfast Guys Who Keep the Nurses from Getting Killed, Tommy Davis "the Thinker" and Paul "Saloon" Sanders will keep me safe.

I'd be lost without those guys. Tommy is from India and is probably just one of the most all around wonderful, kind, honest, and genuinely good hearted people I'll ever have the privilege to meet. He's just extraordinary. He calls everyone "Boss". I asked him where it came from and he told me he had a rich uncle who owned a car dealership back in India, and he called everyone Boss. So when Tommy asked him why, his uncle told him " I can never remember anyone's names." Paul is funny, we discuss television shows and have in depth conversations on where the cheapest gas can be found in the immediate 5 mile radius.

And this is me- for the rest of the day, doing nothing. On the deck. With the Dogs. And Bug.

Still alive.

2006-07-28T14:07:00.000-04:00

In case you were wondering. When it gets hot like this, I just want to hibernate. Someplace cold and dark, something cavelike perhaps. Without albino murdering freaks though. They'd impede my rest.

Work is a drag, we've a new doctor who apparently is a fan of the Tom Cruise school of psychiatry, i.e. no medications for the ACUTELY PSYCHOTIC AND OFTEN ASSAULTIVE PATIENTS we have. He used to work on the addiction unit. We're attempting to convince him our patients are not drug addicts, they are acutely psychotic, and therefore need ativan. Asshat. The place is like Bedlam now.

Well, I'm off there now! Have a great weekend, those of you who managed to stumble back here accidentally....

Formulary Addition- I've finally got my Laudanum!!

2006-07-11T08:54:00.000-04:00

I've been searching and searching and finally found one. Isn't it glorious? The dosing is as follows:

3 months old: 1 drop
1 Year Old: 3 drops
4 Years Old: 5 drops
10 Years Old: 10 drops
20 Years Old: 20 drops
Adults: 25 drops.

Remember, this is opium dissolved in alcohol. Imagine giving this to a colicky baby?
No. Per cent. of Morphia. Grains of Morphia to the Fluidounce.- I have No. 10 so it's 0.98 4.29

Fox takes photo

2006-07-08T17:54:00.000-04:00

Industrial landscape. Imagine ethereal music

House update & Foxglove's Formulary's desired acquisitions

2006-06-27T08:10:00.000-04:00

But 1st, stolen from Hidden Shallows,a great Chris Eccleston fansite, enjoy my new motto.

Before:

After:

Before:

Before:

After:

More to come. We're particularly excited about our Cabinet of Curiosities room (with med table and poison bottles and giant train station clock) Hoping to get more weird medical shit. this item is something I'd KILL for. So, so cool. And other items for when I win the lottery - this fantastic collection of jars and this, this makes me weep for the longing for it. . I particularly like the bloodletting instruments.

Above all, I wish to someday own on of these. I woudn't want to be victim of old medicine, but damn the instruments are fascinating. And I realllllly want a laudanum bottle. And the Vapo Cresolene oil burner. We bought a bottle of the vapo cresoline in Bay city, and had to pull the car over to let it air out. My father in law, the Dow chemist, had to dispose of the contents in some weird private poison dumping thing. It's the old equivalent of the humidifer. Lovely, no?

My neighbors have a pool. I wish I had a gun.

2006-06-26T13:27:00.000-04:00

Ok, not really. But they're in it ALL THE TIME. As is the rest of the frelling neighborhood. They shoot off fireworks all the time. Like, all the time. Isaac freaks out and the whole backyard smells like gunpowder for hours. Mr Pool Neighbor has this crazy loud booming voice, and he is apparently physically incapable of modulating the volume of his voice. I've got acutely psychotic patients who are better at controlling the volume of their voices than this asshat is.

So. How do we retaliate? Bug doesn't want to call the cops cause he knows they'll know it was us, and we don't really want open war. But we do want to feel as though we're fighting back. So: behold our revenge. We're burying it right next to the fence:

I don't know if they'll actually be able to smell it, but just having it there will make me feel better. Oh, and I'm going to make sure they know I'm a nurse and I know CPR, but not to bother asking me to help because since they're so damned loud, I need to blast the AC to tune them out.

It's currently raining, and the fuckers are in the pool anyway. Come on, lightning...

Foxglove's new actor boyfriend

2006-06-16T12:59:00.000-04:00

I have selected another man for my harem of "alternate universe" boyfriends. This one is Christopher Eccleston. Yeah, me and Bug saw the very last ep on Sci Fi of the new Doctor Who and within 15 minutes I was all "I love him..I lurve him!" (if you saw that episode, you'll understand why I'm not overly pleased now) but you'll be happy to know that the boxed set arrives at my door July 5. I also got Cracker on DVD, cause I've been eyeing it for awhile (I love UK detective series- Touching Evil, Second Sight, Midsomer Murders, Wire in the Blood) cause of the fabulous Robbie Coltrane, and then I found out that my new man was in it, yep- had to buy. It's fun to see Hagrid all cursing and drunk. It's quite good.

And if you've ever heard of the "Let Him Have It!" murder case in the 50's, you should check out the movie of the same name. Yeah, Eccleston again, but also very,very good.

So. Behold my new man:

But Bug is still my favorite.

The Sun- it Burns!

2006-06-13T16:42:00.000-04:00

Girl to girl talk. Isn't she a doll?

Foxglove Would Have to Wait for her Revenge...

2006-06-07T23:25:00.000-04:00

I know I promised a more "ass kicking" picture this week, but Bug's out with the boys after a HELL DAY at work, and he's got the camera so I'm stuck with my little camera phone...so Foxglove's Revenge will have to wait till next week. Until then...Shoes!

Pourquoi devez-vous regarder des jambes que la couleur des poissons se gonfle?

Weil mein König,Osbasso,es also befohlen hat, für es ist
HNT

And no, I don't speak French or German. But wouldn't it be cool if I did?

Ladies! Send me your shoe links!

2006-06-06T16:10:00.000-04:00

I thought this was kind of special.

And I'm having footwear crisis. Cannot wear boots into 99 degree weather in July, will look insane. But need height. And ankle support. And cute. And cheap, as Bug has placed me on a fashion budget to my..impulsivity. (I buy cheap things, but I buy a lot and then it's like I got expensive things. Stupid not everything being free for me ness...)

So- ladies, I'm calling on you- send me links to cute platformy heels (no skinny heels, will trip and die) with some kind of ankle like support. Help?

edited to add: Thanks MelodyCensor! I have a few items sitting in shopping cart that I'm considering...

Punnett's Squares and the Illegitimacy of Mrs Whopper

2006-06-03T18:18:00.000-04:00

So the Burger King commercial with the Whopper Dad and Whopper Jr? Got me thinking. Is Whoppertism Syndrome like hemophila in that it's an X-linked chromosome, or perhaps enjoying the smooth relaxing sounds of Kenny G? Because you'll notice that Mrs Whopper and Whopperette appear to not suffer the same affliction... Perhaps they have hidden pickles or onions though...Because, if we follow Punnett's Square, (we not being Foxglove cause she constantly frelled this up in school along with algebra, especially Parabola related issues) we see that there should be some sort of Burger King related gene type thing going on with the females. Unless of course, Mrs Whopper got it on with the Hamburgler or something instead, and Whopperette is illegitimate.

I'd be interested to know your take on the whole scenario...And incidentally? The mathworld site? My worst nightmare. My brother-in-law is a math genius who is currently studying for his PhD in Theoretical Algebra (AAAAAHHH!!), and we visited him a few summers ago while he was an undergrad, spending hours cooped up in a room with chalkboards and whiteboards covering all wall surfaces- 360 degrees, with a small space for a door, covered entirely in insane looking equations. I actually started to get itchy (hives) and needed to go outside and take a tranquilizer and smoke 5 cigarettes. I'm like that Math is Hard! Barbie only without the humanly impossible figure. Also I'm not a blonde. Ok, this might be what it really is, with more blonde highlights but.. as it's been 16 years with red, I consider myself a born again redhead. Damnit.

Oh, and for all of you who were concerned about Bug killing me in the last HNT cause of the shoes (ok who just wanted to talk about the shoes-I got mine here) and as you can plainly tell, not only am I not dead, I'm actually smarter!

Or not. Plus, I need these. In Plum and in Black. Donations happily accepted. Aughra would want you to buy these for me...so would her baby....Do it for Blasty and Aughra! Let's Do it For Johnny!

He told me no more shoes...

2006-05-31T23:03:00.000-04:00

And he meant it... In a role reversal for this week's HNT, Bug no longer content to be "the corpse" has our darling damsel under the knife so to speak. I'm sure I can convince him not to go through with it, but he is understandably chagrined at being poisoned and skewered with scissors in past HNTs.

Be sure to visit King Osbasso and also read his (in)famous? decrees on HNT here.

The Formulary Has New Addition

2006-05-31T11:41:00.000-04:00

Foxglove's Formulary now with medical examination table...

Vanity Gone Wrong

2006-05-27T20:15:00.000-04:00

Yeah. Jersey. Sometimes it's too easy to make fun of us. Sigh. This was at theatre after watching X-Men 3.

I Love My Deck HNT

2006-05-24T14:00:00.000-04:00

OK, I know it's not even 2 pm but I've got to get to work and they don't have the internet on the psych floor. Imagine that. In fact we have an ancient computer we call "Microsoft Jesus" cause it's that old. Yay technology!

Another early, and thankfully, failed attempt at attempting to turn my skin from fish belly white to a more appealing shade of "Live Person". I just get more freckles and all burny. Anyway, I promise to stop making you all admire my most recent ink which hurt really really badly after this one.

Go check out our Chieftan, the Mighty Osbasso and also go here to learn more about the ancient art of here.

And more importantly- does the wood on the deck look funky? Like dried out our possibly..termitey? I'm worried.. And ignore the stretch mark. This proves lack of photoshop, dammit. No, don't go looking for it now....

Movie Star Delusions

2006-05-20T13:12:00.000-04:00

I'm a movie star! And no I'm not topless, it's strapless dress.

And there's a reason people as pale as me shoudn't sit in the sun. I now have an extra 14,498 freckles on my arms and a bunch more in the decolletage, as well as annoying burn. Stupid sun.

Foxglove Loves Aughra. Warning- extremely cheesy.

2006-05-20T01:45:00.000-04:00

When I was working in Jersey City in 2001 (right across from where the WTC was for most of my time there) and I used to log into the UPN.com Buffy the Vampire Slayer posting board "the Bronze" and browse around, occasionally delurking to post a comment here and there, I never thought it would change my life. But it did, cause I met this girl, Aughra, who liked all kinds of cool things (Johnny Cash, the same hot movie guys, the same ridiculous fashion things, books, music, and who had the same brilliant sense of humor I'm blessed to possess. -thanks Dad for that-) So, in addition to subtly mocking this one chick who clearly imagined herself seated on a large velvet chaise with devoted servants flocking to and fro, we gradually got to know each other a little more, and started e-mailing each other. She gave me her number, I gave her mine, and I'll never forget that the first time we spoke, I was driving on the road I used to live on, on my way to work, just past Bug's super duper Nerd Farm (by the Dunkin Donuts) and that I could tell by her voice that she was awesome. We chatted a little bit, because there's a cell phone dead zone right by there, and I called her the next day. By the time we met in person, (Aug, how many months after we started talking was it? Not many..2? 3?) I already felt as if I'd known her for years, only with her only hearing about all the stupid and shitty things I'd done without having gone through them and being jaded by them. She is my super friend- I know she'll indulge me a bit, but only for so long before she tells me to just get over it. I get to hear her joy in being a mom (to a kid I'd happily clone) and about her great relationship with her dad, and I get to identify with her relationship with her mom, which is wonderful, but as most mother daughter relationships are, is also bumpy. We've commiserated over weight, bad hair issues, stupid husband days, and our mutual hatred of Lindsay Lohan. She's smarter than me, and I love her so much that it's actually ok. I feel kind of bad for all of you out there who know Aughra only through the blog, and have never actually gotten to see how she really does brighten a room by walking into it, or how infectious her smile and laugh are. Granted, watching guy after guy trip over their dick to talk to her gets a little ego smooshy, but she's worth it. There's no occasion for this, I was just sitting around and thinking (after her last text of the night, about Anderson Cooper and whether we think he's gay considering how fey he looks in Vanity Fair, and how she texted me to tell me that Norman was going to be on SVU) about how great she is.

She tolerates my babbling messages about work, about ER on TNT in the mornings, about goats, and about my insane GI tract. She's the best friend I could ever hope for. And she's all mine, suckers! Aughra, I love you darlin'.

Here are some happy Aughra and Foxglove pictures! The "I loved this slip so much I had to buy one for her too" photo collage, and a smiley picture from her most recent picture. I can't wait to meet this next kid, cause I know he'll be just as great as Gus because her and Fodge breed great kids...

Happy Anniversary, HNT!!

2006-05-17T23:48:00.000-04:00

shawl

So, the magical HNT is ONE YEAR OLD TODAY! And our chieftan, Osbasso wanted us to post our first every HNT (see above) and a new one celebrating the one year anniversary. (See below) Well, I haven't got champagne or balloons or confetti, but I do have the same shawl I wore in the first one in black, and with lots of credit due to HNT, way more self confidence. So I'm celebrating in MY NEW HOUSE by wearing similar outfit, with mostly full belly showing, and what is supposed to be coy smile. And it's blurry cause I suck at photography, not cause it's camera phone. To steal from AughraLuv again, since I'm incapable of independent thought, you can see most of my old HNTs here.

HAPPY HALF NEKKID THURSDAY EVERYONE! AND HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BIG BROTHER GRIMM!

poop shouldn't be a weapon, man!

2006-05-15T03:17:00.000-04:00

Remember this special patient?

He's back, and just as handy with the feces as ever. Admitted Friday at 5 am, throwing feces and smearing on walls by 9 am. This poor kid is one of the sickest patients ever. And he's two years younger than me, and will just never get better. The best he gets is still REALLY sick. It's sad. But he's also scary as hell, not just for the poop throwing, but because he gets the really bad command hallucinations, the kind that tell him to try and poke his own eyes out and also to attack us because
a. We don't believe that he's John the Baptist, here to save the Muslim race
b. We're not letting him pray enough
c. We are trying to dissuade him from doing things like SMEARING feces on the face of nurses (obviously not Foxglove because they wouldn't let me write this from prison, which is where I'd be now) and try to bite people. Last time he was in, he was in this thing (scroll down to item 2) a bunch of times, and needed the 5 2 1 IMs (Haldol 5mg, Ativan 2mg, Cogentin 1mg) each time. It tooks us about 6 weeks to get him even close to stabilized, and the one medication that worked for him can't be used anymore because he had a seizure 4 weeks ago and they (the doctors or Popes as they're sometimes known as) can't be sure it wasn't cause of the Clozaril . So, the one medication that helps the kid? Helps quiet the awful voices that try to get him to hurt himself (and others, yeah) and have essentially stolen his life? He can't take. But we spend lots of money on medication research for erectile dysfunction. Tom Cruise also does a lot to forward the cause of mental health research, and since it's been awhile, let me just mention again how much I hate him for the misinformation he spews that hurts people who need help but who listen to him because he's a Thetan possessed friggin celebrity. (trying not to cuss for my mum and dad). Asshat.

I'm terrified of him, and my heart breaks for him at the same time.

This is my job.

Multimedia message

2006-05-13T17:25:00.000-04:00

Behold the 3 legged dog foraging for survival. It's like PBS!

An Actual Nursing Post!

2006-05-05T12:22:00.000-04:00

So...we all know that the patients on my floor can be a bit patience draining. Occasionally soul sucking even. So, basically, you need to be able to deal with a lot. I'm not even for a moment going to pretend it's anywhere as near as difficult or stressful as medical/surgical nursing (in a different way) but, if you can't deal with people in general, you reallywon't be able to deal with our patients.

As a general rule, anything that would be cathartic for you to say, like "Shut Up!" to someone who's been calling you all kinds of horrible things for 7 hours is just unacceptable. I'm not saying it's not something you'd like to do, but as a licensed professional, you need to suck it up and do what we (i.e. the good nurses do) and WALK INTO THE OTHER ROOM and mutter under your breath or close the door to the chart room and tell all the other nurses how desperately you wish to commit some kind of gruesome murder. And then you get over it. Obvious, right?

Not for one of our staff. An LPN, proving that in our hospital anyway, most LPNs are crap. At my old job, the only LPN I knew was by far one of the Best Nurses Ever and I learned tons from her. This one, however, is cruising for a firing.

Saturday- tells a patient to shut up, overheard by our awesome weekend social worker, who tells Stella the Bullet Stevens who, understandably, freaks the hell out. She tells the LPN "You can't tell the patients to shut up!" She's ready to kill LPN anyway, because LPN's medication administration skills are pretty weak. Like when he tries to give patients their 8 pm meds at 4 pm. And doesn't notice how that's wrong. Or gives patient Depakote ER instead of Depakote NOT ER because that's what was in the patient's drawer, making it clear that it's a good thing pharmacy doesn't send down K Cl because our patients would all be DEAD.

Cause LPN is missing some crucial brain bits. Social skills noticeably. Sunday night: we've a patient who's on 72 hour meds (that means he doesn't get to refuse cause he gets injections instead then and you can read all about how that works here, and we don't use it that often and we hate giving people shots instead of pills when pills are the easier option. (though I am AWESOME at giving injections) and LPN tells patient to "stop being such a crybaby, my grandmother takes shots better than this". LPN then read riot act by Foxglove, who is totally mortified that such an incident has occurred on her watch. Foxglove immediately tells Stella on her return from break. Stella is not pleased, but as Foxglove has already reprimanded LPN there is no reason for her to do so also.

Monday, Stella and Foxglove are both off. Hooray! Tuesday night we hear little bits and pieces of the LPN's stupidity, but Wednesday night (LPN off) Tommy Davis "the Thinker" and Paul "Saloon" Sanders tell us this little nugget. LPN apparently SLAPPED patient in face and said "Now don't swear anymore!" How much was witnessed remains in debate. In addition, this particular patient has been coming in to hospital for 20+ years and is sadly, so used to being beaten down, that he didn't say anything. He makes us all crazy, but we all kind of think fondly of him, (and desperately wish he'd get away from the nursing station and stop asking all of us the same question 9000 times and no, Mr. Patient, I'm NEVER going to agree with you that the medications are bad for you and again, NO, "If you were my wife I'd prove to you how wrong that is" is not something I ever want to hear again, so just give us a break. You know we all want the best for you. You're a legend here.)

Stella, Theresa "Hellish Devil" Payne and Doris "Shotgun" something or other and I just stood there, mouths agape. What? He did what? You've got to be kidding.

We're waiting for fallout. We tried to warn him, we tried to tell him constructively what needed to be fixed. But idiot didn't listen....

having 2 dogs is great.

2006-05-02T12:40:00.000-04:00

They are getting along well, though Daisy is a little devil and likes to steal Isaac's cookies, toys, and any and all socks. (they are ours, not Isaac's) She also likes to eat shoes, which obviously is not cool. She is super pliable, and if you place her somehwere she will just lay there and sleep, with all 3 of her legs up in the air. Her and Isaac like to run around together and knock things over.

Behold, Daisy- Miss Ecuador Mixed Breed Dog 2006

2006-04-28T22:43:00.000-04:00

Home safe!

Daisy and Bug in the Car! Coming back from LaGuardia!

2006-04-28T21:52:00.000-04:00

Daisy!

Daisy's flight was delayed= she was supposed to arrive last night but there was some bad weather in Ecuador so the poor baby had to wait until today and she was in a crate for 48 hours straight! Now she is home though! Welcome Daisy!

That music shuffle/ question thing that EVERYONE's done

2006-04-27T13:04:00.000-04:00

You hit shuffle, and press next for each question. And thus the answers to the mysteries of life are revealed. I think that is how it works...

Please note: My Itunes is STUFFED to the gills w/like ALL of Nick Cave so he shows up a lot. I skipped a couple of his, could probably do alternate list with just him...

Will I get far in life? Win and Lose- Ollie Olsen from Dogs in Space soundtrack

How do my friends see me? I Put a Spell On You- Nick Cave & the bad seeds

Where will I get married? Has it Come to This? – The Streets

What is my best friend's theme song? Edge of a Broken Heart – Vixen (sorry Aughra)

What is the story of my life? Every Day is Like Sundays – the Smiths

What was high school like? True Love – The Marching Girls (from Dogs in Space soundtrack, same as 1st song)

How can I get ahead in life? Empty Chairs at Empty Tables- Les Misérables

What is the best thing about me? Giles from Buffy saying “Grave Robbing? That’s new and interesting!” and then Buffy replies “I know you meant to say ‘gross and disturbing’.”

How is today going to be? I Need a Man- Eurythmics

What is in store for this weekend? Burn For You – INXS (c. 1984)

What song describes my parents? Lost in the Supermarket- The Clash

My grandparents? There for the Grace of God Go I- Flogging Molly

How is my life going? Austin Prison- Johnny Cash

What song will they play at my funeral? Built for Speed – Stray Cats

How does the world see me? Little Ghost Song- Nick Cave & the bad seeds

Will I have a happy life? – the Snow White Diner- the Handsome Family

What do my friends really think of me? City Baby Attacked by Rats - GBH

Do people secretly lust after me? Common People – Pulp

How can I make myself happy? Boys Don’t Cry- the Cure

What should I do with my life? Distracting yourself from the Doom- Michael J Sheehey

Will I ever have children? Creek Lullaby – Margaret (from Deadwood soundtrack. It’s gorgeous)

What is some good advice? Hour of Darkness- Social Distortion

What is my signature dancing song? Hell in A Shower – Eddie Izzard’s bit

What do I think my current theme song is? Absolutely Fabulous “I am Thin and Gorgeous” – Junior Vasquez (hee hee)

What does everyone else think my current theme song is? Do You love Me (part 2) Nick Cave & the bad seeds

What type of men/women do you like? Extra Dry – Thomas Bangalter – from soundtrack to “Irreversible”

The All Nick All the Time Version

Will I get far in life? I’ve Been a Rover – Nick Cave and Shane Macgowan
How do my friends see me? Darker with the Day- Nick & bad seeds
Where will I get married? Supernaturally
What is my best friend's theme song? Lay me Low
What is the story of my life? –the Kindness of Strangers
What was high school like? Hard on For Love
How can I get ahead in life? The Weeping SOng
What is the best thing about me? Some Velvet Morning – Nick and Lydia Lunch
How is today going to be? Get Ready for Love
What is in store for this weekend? When I First Came to Town
What song describes my parents? City of Refuge (acoustic version)
My grandparents? Lucy
How is my life going? Rainy Night In Soho
What song will they play at my funeral? God’s Hotel
How does the world see me? Henry Lee
Will I have a happy life? – King Kong Kitchee Kitchee Ki-Mi-O
What do my friends really think of me? Sad Waters
Do people secretly lust after me? Where the Wild Roses Grow
How can I make myself happy? I Let Love In
What should I do with my life? I Threw it All Away
Will I ever have children? There She Goes, My Beautiful World
What is some good advice? Fable of the Brown Ape
What is my signature dancing song? What Can I Give You
What do I think my current theme song is? Cannibal’s Hymn
What does everyone else think my current theme song is? Stagger Lee
What type of men/women do you like? Long Time Man

Lazy HNT with brother label maker addiction

2006-04-26T23:29:00.000-04:00

edited to add that the flash seems to have contrasted out all the freckles. I assure you they are there.
I'm back, kind of...what's all this Half Nekkid Stuff? Click the link to find out...

DAISY COMES IN TWO DAYS!!!!!

2006-04-26T00:34:00.000-04:00

YAY!!!

Also- I am going to try and get my shit together for HNT this week lest you all think I've gained 500 lbs and developed huge pock marks. (only 340 lbs and a few pox...) Plus, I miss Osbasso and the rest of the HNT gang. Also- since I've been busy (see below) I want to add this: Lecram, I really did read all the "Lies" series and I loved all of it, we've just got erratic connections here and everytime I tried to comment the phone would ring and it cuts off the computer um..connection...(I like technical things yay) and I"ve been too busy/lazy/afraid/apathetic to call the cable/computer people and make a stink. I also haven't gone to the DMV for my new license yet. Although, I did finally change my Macy's card to my married name. (It'll be 5 years in November!)

We've been busy trying to make the house look less like Strawberry Shortcake and all the Boyd's Bears were murdered and their blood splattered on the walls. Well, ok Bug does most of the painting, but I tell him where spots are missing, and I totally painted the ENTIRE radiator. Any ideas for modes of death for Bug this week? I've got more poisons but I just did that one...I have one idea in mind....Hmm.... Go visit Aughra if you haven't done so today already, she's been a little stressed and feeling a little down and since she's my best girl I'm asking you all en masse to go over there and remind her just how fantastic she is.

More house crap and the Killer Snowman Army (Legio Gemina XIII)

2006-04-17T20:13:00.000-04:00

I'm sure you're all breathless with anticpation. Moving in to one place and moving out of another leaves little time for blogging. Plus, this is only remotely interesting thing in my life. House is cool. I LURVE having a washer and dryer. The cats really like the deck- and all they care about is getting out the door in any way possible, and achieving Bliss of Deck. Presumably, they wish to escape their cruel human overlords who feed them a lot and shower them with affection and let them walk wherever they please. Tough life...but yes, Escape the Cruel Human Overlords and Get Bliss of Deck!

I also finally had Bug bring over my admittedly somewhat frightening stuffed animal collection. It's in the guest room, and it is completely dominated by the Snowman Army. They were 75% off at CVS in 2004, and I had images of them all being thrown into a shredder because nobody wanted them. (I had 8 already) So I bought all that remained and placed them in formation. They're happiest this way..

And yes, we plan on repainting. Shudder. It's like Strawberry Shortcake and all her little sugary friends vomited all over the walls. Sadly, most of the house is like this now. We're repainting. Tomorrow, actuallly..

2006-04-10T12:26:00.000-04:00

Look at pretty girl who lives next door!

House Update

2006-04-08T02:26:00.000-04:00

Behold the Bug Building! It's a desk. Or it will be, anyway. My boy is handy. Our house is super. Yay!

2006-04-04T13:16:00.000-04:00

Look at the pretty angora. Mmm. Pretty socks...

And we have closing date! Plus, important shoe survey.

2006-04-01T11:14:00.000-05:00

Yay! But it's Wednesday at 11:30 am. Which is totally cool but I have to do my CPR renewal from 7:30 till 11:30 at work, and I've been trying to get into that class since January because they only have room for 6 people in each class. In a hospital. Where EVERYONE needs to be CPR certified. And I have yet to master how to be in two places at once. Being in one place is difficult enough. Then after the closing, described by others as "oh, it's fine, just take an Ativan because it takes two hours and is really stressful as you hand over these huge ass checks" I work 3-11:30 on Wednesday, aka Admission Day, because our doctors like to clean house on Tuesday and Wednesday and the ER usually fills up on weekends. Also Thursday and Friday evenings and Saturday night which last time was such a nightmare that I've completely omitted it from memory. Or I'm trying to. Now going to add Bug to my checking account. But here's the important thing- I can't wear my boots in summer and spring, I'll look like a lunatic.

Are these remotely cute, or just totally orthopedic looking? Remember, am gimp, and cannot wear skinny heels or skinny straps. And I don't like my toes. And I need at least 3 1/2" heel. Help?

I want to hibernate.

Photo for Your One Word to Describe Foxglove Comments...please?

2006-03-27T07:00:00.000-05:00

This is my new tattoo. No mom, it was only like $50. Really. Oh, and it was finished at 10:35 and I had to be at work at 11 for what was the WORST NIGHT SHIFT EVER. Details to follow in a few days once I've recovered.

Anyway, I noticed around blogger that people have been asking others to find one word to describe them. I'd really love to know what you guys would say- How would you describe Foxglove in one word, based upon what you've read here, read of me at Aughra's and the occasional mention at BTE Express?

So- you're all aware of my utterly non-existent social life (work is it, folks. That's EVERYTHING) and my general self pity. So give a girl a break. My right side is still killing me, from the recent carving into my ribcage (thanks Agent,) for being very patient with my whimpering and cracking me up and just all around being a great guy. Despite the fact that I actually wanted to get out of the chair and run away probably 5 times, he was very sweet and encouraging. "You're doing great, hon" he'd say, five minutes after reminding me to stop talking and laughing cause it was messing up the lettering. He did a great job. Everyone at the studio was fantastic- friendly and they were all very kind about not pointing out the flab on the belly but being impressed that I was getting ribwork done and didn't actually scream or cry (though I wanted to). If Agent hadn't also been a smoker I don't think I'd have made it. He was fantastic, and is now the only person who shall tattoo me. Not that I'll be able to afford another one for several years, and hopefully he'll still be working there. Great guy. Bug stopped by several times and was very supportive, and even gave Agent tips on shutting me up, since when I talk I move and when I move- the needle moves and the tattoo gets messed up.

But back to the point-
Here's a Free Photo Not on HNT in Exchange for One Word To Describe the Foxglove you know from Here...What do you say? Help a girl out?

Link-O-Rama-Rama!

2006-03-25T13:08:00.000-05:00

But 1st- go here! The seal hunt has begun and there are already over 9000 dead and it's only been on for 9 hours! Help!

Vermont Country Store.
Has vintage perfumes that are impossible to find here, this kick ass tablecloth:

and lots of other neat stuff, like the only soap to be used in the 1st class suites of the Titanic (not that your bathroom will sink).

Also take this test- you all know about breed registration, especially for pit bulls who are often mistakenly accused. Take the test- can you pick out which one is the pit bull?

I want just about everything here, and absolutely everything in the "Dainties" collection.

I love DIY shops...And this is a link page of shops that I frequently fantasy shop at. (That means loading up shopping cart, usually to about $400 and then just leaving the web page. Cuz am poor.

Go forth, and have fun with the shopping! Because I can't.

Oh and check out some really good smelly candles here. We can't all afford diptyque or D.L. & Co which is a shame, because look at that gorgeous packaging. And this one clearly costs so much because as anyone who's seen Chamber of Secrets, or has read this scary propaganda knows, mandrakes are a bitch to work with.....

Have I recently mentioned how much I hate not being rich?

I Need a Hobby. And you can be one of my Patients! Take this quiz!

2006-03-24T02:10:00.000-05:00

Now I spend too much time listening to wav files from movies. Alan Rickman ones are always great, because he's got such a wonderful voice. (You've heard my audio clip in my profile, yeah?)

Wooderson in Dazed and Confused. Ash from Army of Darkness where there should really be better quotes but this one'll have to do..Janeane Garafalo as Agent Shelby in Clay Pigeons whom Bug has seen walking her dogs in the city and he says she is TINY. Bug also met Bruce Campbell when BC came to a film making presentation at Michigan State, and has informed that he's a. very little and b. really kind of mean and in love with himself. But, he's Ash, so..Ok.

I did a group last night at work, where 13 of my (at the time 17- by the end of shift 19 with another on the way) attended.
These are the questions:

If you could give real happiness to one person, who would it be and why? (answers varied, some were "me" which I thought was pretty damn valid)

Tell the rest of us something about you that others might not know by looking at you. (this got a little disturbing- the Cthulu kid is back, so we had to listen to demonology and he's REALLY difficult to refocus, also one of my least favorites of all time, hereafter LFOAT, just scroll down to see who I mean, kept going on about how he's an orphan {he's not and his mother visits him daily} and how that allows him to marry multiple women starting from a young age. Other less disturbing answers: I like to read, I love planting flowers and plants, I miss my dogs, and I wish I was shopping,)

If you could pick one person from history to ask anything of who would it be and what would you ask? Jesus came out way ahead in this one. Reason? He's Jesus. I actually got a 'duh' for that one, from the patient who actually introduced himself to the rest of the group as Jesus Christ in nice textbook example of grandiose delusional thinking cause, if this guy really is him, we're all totally fucked. You can ask the kid he almost strangled the night before, which seems sort of not so Christlike to me, even though I'm a heathen and not really up on the JC stuff.

If you could spend a day with any famous person, alive or dead, who would it be and what would you want to do for the day? Again, Jesus was the big winner (we've got 5 religiously preoccupied people right now), but Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie were also mentioned, as was Colin Farrell, Earhart (I was psyched by that one, even though it came from LFOAT and he was answering the question above and he wanted to know "how she flew so high"). I just tuned him out and played the Amelia songs I know and love by the Handsome Family (track 10) and a song by Neutral Milk Hotel that sorta reminds me of her but mainly I just love cause it's beautiful....(Holland, 1945).

The rest of the group just sort of descended into religious rants and paranoia about who was going to know the answers they were giving....

Sometimes the classics just seem so right....

2006-03-22T22:32:00.000-05:00

Here's my latest contribution to Boot Hill as well as this week's Half Nekkid Thursday.

I told him I was sick of him borrowing my socks, like, hundreds of times.

Check the outtakes here and here, which should also help assuage any fears any of you might've had about Bug's well being...

Also- Please please please consider this guy-he needs a home!
If any of you are in the NC area PLEASE look into adopting this awesome little guy!

MORTGAGE APPROVED!!

2006-03-20T12:17:00.000-05:00

So long, crappy apartment. So long, crap landlady who makes me want to scream!.

Hello, lots and lots of bills. And ridiculous amounts of expense on things that are not frivolous accessories. (No more ringtones) No matter how attractive I may find actor in movie I've discovered (hey, did any of you see Boondock Saints? Yeah. I just did. It's kind of shite. But I totally love it. People have been recommending it for ages "oh you like Irish things, you gotta watch this movie." But I would say "yeah, but the guys are American. No accents. Less appealing.") But- they speak with accents, and yeah Flannery's holds up much better than Reedus' but I really think Murphy is adorable, and I want to create a Norman Reedus film database (like the Cassel, Rickman, Oldman, Thewlis, Hawkes ones) but I can't. Plus Willem Dafoe can really do no wrong, right? Well, maybe he can, but after he was Elias in Platoon anything is forgivable.

And I can't buy Shoes.

Ok, I wouldn't have been able to buy those anyway, but I'd like to. There's a lot of cute shoes out there this year, shoes that are just itching to make my ankle suffer, but I can't afford any of them. I am however stopping at Target on my way to work to hit the clearance socks because I have none.

no more work.....

2006-03-20T01:06:00.000-05:00

Just finished evening 3 of a 4 evening run. Exhausted. Head hurts. Back hurts. Urge to kill almost overwhelming. New head nurse is so evil she's got her own heraldic crest. The schedule is like this for the rest of the month. We have one of the worst batch of patients we've had in ages.

It's like the beginning of Halloween, we've got that great caliber of patients running around now.

Which is why I'm praying that the Jersey Devil is real, and can open locks, and likes nurses, so that I'll have a good excuse not to go tomorrow, since I've got NO sick time and am basically screwed. Oh, and cause I'm a total geek, I really, really need this. I can almost promise I won't use it as a weapon.

dog adoption update....and added at 6 pm dog that needs help!

2006-03-15T11:13:00.000-05:00

If any of you are in the NC area PLEASE look into adopting this awesome little guy! His time is limited, and he needs help! He's a pug mix with an underbite and is very cute and Stewart needs a home! Here's his picture!

Betty's adoption fell through, and the lovely people from the rescue called us- but they were afraid that Betty would be kind of bossy and upset if she wasn't the only dog...and we'd already committed to another dog- Daisy from Ecuador

with her 3 legs and her cute little accent. She got her rear right leg crushed by..something...but she's been rescued by some wonderful people in Ecuador . They found and saved her, and one of their representatives flew up to NYC and met with the rescue organization that led us to Daisy. And Daisy will be ours as soon as we move into our house....and she'll be able to play with Isaac and Betty because......

But Betty? Betty is going to be adopted by my friend who lives in the city- he LURVES dogs, and is the only person who likes Nick Cave as much as me. When we first met, I had a huge crush on him- but he didn't like me that way so my friend Patsy was convinced he was gay. Um, no...if all the guys I liked I didn't like me because they were gay- there would be many, many, many more homosexual guys in the 15 mile radius of where I grew up...

But he likes little dark haired girls (petite, people, not young) - and Betty is little, and dark haired, and he met her last night and he's going to adopt her today. I'm totally thrilled. Betty gets a good home- and my Nick Cave friend gets a great dog. They will make a great pair and I will post more pictures of them together when I get them.

Yay! Betty gets good home AND I get to see her!

Aughra left today. Sad Foxglove.

2006-03-13T20:35:00.000-05:00

Also sad because lovely RAZR phone just upped and died on me and I had to get new one. And since I had all my phonebook entries with photos- they were only saved to phone. That means I DON'T HAVE ANYONE'S NUMBER ANYMORE. And that all my good pictures are gone. Before the RAZR died, I sent all my pics to my email. Tried sending them back to phone. Phone gets message, but no picture.

Sob. It's the ROKR and I hate spelling things like this. I now have ITunes on my phone (it was suggested that someone of my elegant natural ability to say, walk without falling over or dropping things, get a heartier phone than the Razor. Refusing to spell it the other way now.)

So, no photos, no numbers, but can have 100 songs I like. And I'm not even mentioning the $50+ worth of ringtones I lost including - the one that had always been Aughra's identifier, the Deadwood theme which is not available for my phone. Borderline suicidal now.

I hate today.

And I think I'm getting fat.

"As you can see, the best way to do it is with scissors."

2006-03-09T00:00:00.000-05:00

Quote is attributed to Alfred Hitchcock, from "Dial M for Murder".

This is the first SHINY NEW BLOG HNT. I'm keeping mum on who the victim is...But I'll have everything cleaned up nice and pretty for Aughra's visit today! I'm leaving to pick her up now, so won't be able to comment on everyone- but me and Aughra will come back later and do some commenting so don't be afraid of the scissors here, and leave me something..please?

She'll never even know......

All the rest of you sleuths should check out the rules of HNT here, and the cool exhibit about it at The HNT Rogue Gallery .

PS:
What's the best way to clean up blood?

I think next time poison would be less messy....

Behold! The New Blog Design- Bug, March 7, 2006

2006-03-07T23:18:00.000-05:00

How kick ass is this? He made it all from scratch. Cause he's the best. And I lurve him.

Listen up! If I don't get comments, I'm holding Aughra hostage....

2006-03-07T17:43:00.000-05:00

validation for the fact that my job, though often wonderful, also sucks my soul out. . MSN, the most reliable and unbiased news service ever (I have absolutely no idea, I like BBC because they don't sugarcoat US news) agrees that only suckers go into nursing and that there will be less and less nurses in the future because the hours are long, the pay is low, the respect in non-existant, and people are too eager to sue. But I'm not giving up. I plan on working until, as my letter from my previous hospital which is apparently confused and thinks I still work there (but alas not confused enough to still pay me) my estimated retirement date.

February 1st, 2041.

Oh and apparently machinists aren't happy either. Can't imagine why, in a job where loss of limb is daily risk.

And now I shall go down a shot or two of tequila and crash out on the couch, sobbing quietly.

And I mean it about the comments, folks.....Imagine AUghra tied to a chair (not in the way you're thinking, you big pervs) being held for ransom- which in this case is comments. Help Foxglove. Please.

My Brothers Grimm are Awesome.

2006-03-07T13:03:00.000-05:00

Younger brother Grimm lives in Maine. Antiqueland. He and I and Elder Brother Grimm have scavenged for creepy things I like and for elder brother mid-century furniture for his teensy apt and he was there recently and found this. It opens like this and even has stirrups!! , and by the way, no Bug and I are not into kinky medical fetish , though I do lurve the slutty nurse costumes. (no Mom, I don't have one).

Isn't my brother awesome? They both are. Elder brother Grimm used to be a Deadhead (he never wore tie-dye) and took me to a show at MSG in 1991, telling me "don't drink anything, eat anything, touch anything, or smoke anything that anyone hands you" and took me to all the parties in high school with his cool older friends (because they loved that he had a little sister "Little Grimmy!") and got to stay out all night cause he was there and my mom was cool with it. However, stupid people from other schools (and stoned ones from our school) would ask if we were dating "you two almost look alike!"

Yeah, cause we're brother and sister, asshat.

Florence Nightingale Didn't Work on My Floor (but to be fair, I'd have lasted maybe 20 second in Crimean War)

2006-03-06T01:33:00.000-05:00

Have patients from hell, and am apparently wearing the crazy and annoying? Come hassle me! pin again. Patients out of control, our attending psychiatrist seems to be going all Tom Cruise and the frelling Clams and has decided not to medicate anyone nearly enough as they need right now- when they've gotten somewhat more stabilized, i.e. not thinking I'm Jill, their sister whom they had "impure thoughts about and she knew and threw pots and pans at me and you look like her- you have her eyes! Jill, I'm going to get you!" and the black belt in some kind of kick ass martial art guy who put 3 staff members in the ER in less than 72 hours, and the always fun passive aggressive man bitch. , they can be transferred to another floor- we're SHORT TERM ACUTE DAMNIT! and have the meds tapered once the FLORID PSYCHOSIS goes away...

Also for some reason, we've got this (ok, the reason is probably related to the fact that he talks non-stop about cthulu and writes really, really, really bad poetry that he makes me read and then gets all pissy when I point out things like "Gluttony is spelled with an O, not glutteny" and "aloth" is not a word, and then wants me to describe his poetry. Then he wants me to rip it up to "activate it". Fuck that. He didn't even go away when "Greg "Loco Cursed" Hawkins", one of my favorite attendants came over with the Bug is a bounty hunter and insanely jealous if I talk to other guys and has put aforementioned other guys in the hospital story we made up awhile ago when it became apparent that committed men on our floor seem to find me pretty. Which is flattering for about .008 seconds before it just becomes really, really creepy. It's also why my nametag says "Foxglove (you all know it's not really what it says there) but instead of MY last name, it changes from things like Snape or Mrs. Lucius Malfoy or Butler or Cassel .

Oh, message above, quoting the inimitable Atia of the Julii from Rome, (look, it's James Purefoy! Yay!)

My sticker says: (which I thought was obvious that I wasn't ACTUALLY WEARING )
I'm your nurse today. Stop ogling me or I'll have you flayed and hung from the door brackets." Atia actually says, "By the Five Furies, if I were not a gentlewoman I would have you flayed...." but my label maker gets tired and there wasn't enough room to write about the five furies.

Rome is the only show besides Deadwood I care about.

I'm a Nurse! (my shirt proves it)

2006-03-04T04:36:00.000-05:00

I'm not wearing lipstick in the picture, which is weird, because normally I refuse to be photographed without it. You can see why. Pale, dry, and missing pigment on upper lip (I"M A FREAK). But I like my braids. You can get that shirt and other similar ones here, cause as you all know I really like the old traditional tattoo style.

Behold- Betty!

2006-03-01T12:08:00.000-05:00

This is Betty, who is 1 and apparently a Boston Terrier mixed with a Brussels Griffon. We think the combo is way cuter than the original, though Isaac does have a friend named Lily who is a Boston and she's totally kick ass.

You can't really see it in this photo, but apparently- Betty has an underbite! Just like our Isaac. Please send your good luck wishes my way so that Betty can come be part of our family. We found her on petfinder which is where all of our pets come from. Currently we're in the "emailing the rescue foundation" part of the adoption process. Happily for Betty, and sadly for us, Betty has been adopted. We wish her all the happiness in the world in her new home with her new guardians who better not suck or I'll frelling cut them, man. Now I have to find a new dog to obsess over and lose to other adopters. Sob.

How cute is she? Who's a good girl? SHe is! She Is! OK, sorry. A little overexcited. Now to go shower and wash hair so I can go get my eyebrows threaded and go to Victoria's Secret to buy something crazy cheap so they'll lace me into my corset. I'm thinking sale rack. Like $9.99 and under.

Blog Getting New Look.....Soon.....

2006-02-28T11:51:00.000-05:00

Bug is going to work his HTML magic to dress up my boring blahhhhg. Expect to see pictures of important and relevant medical things, , a cooler font, links to all the old HNTs, pictures of geeky shite I like . And as always, links to The Most Beautiful and Wonderful Girl in the Whole Wide World, Aughra . Possibly pictures of antique lingerie too, cause I like that sorta stuff.

Ok, so I know these quizzes aren't like, scientific, but...

2006-02-26T23:59:00.000-05:00

What Guys Think of Your Long Curly Hair...

Fun, outgoing, spontaneous.
Guys know that you're up for almost anything - and are waiting for your surprises.

What Do Guys Think Of Your Hair?

Doesn't that just make me (and all long curly haired girls) sound like a total slut? Ick.

Trains Go Fast!

2006-02-25T15:26:00.000-05:00

Go trains, go!

Foxglove Got to Run the Trains!

2006-02-25T15:22:00.000-05:00

This is me at my Dad's train show. I GOT TO RUN THE TRAINS! more pictures to follow...

This can't be real.

2006-02-22T01:16:00.000-05:00

But I think it is. Now, y'all know I'm not a political anything (I do get soap boxy about the homeless dogs and cats thing) but as far as things like actual politics, politicians, and the war- I try to stay out of it. As for the war- I hate that so many of our soldiers are dying. I hate that soldiers from other countries are dying. I hate that thousands of innocent civilians are dying. Overall, I would say that I think war is a bad thing. I've encountered more than a few psychiatric patients who are veterans- Vietnam, the Gulf (the one before this one) and Korea, and I can't even begin to imagine the horrors that these men went through.

I would never join any of the armed forces. But that's cause I'm a total pussy, and wouldn't even survive the bus ride to bootcamp without suffering a nervous breakdown. Any place they can make you do push ups? Yeah. Not for Fox. Bug is all noble and would probably think about joining up if we had some Pearl Harbor like thing (other than 9/11) but I'd shoot him in the damn foot or cut his frelling fingers off before I let that happen. (same for you two, Brothers Grimm)

Don't get me wrong- I have nothing but the utmost respect, and I think actual awe for (at? My grammar is confusing me) the men and women who are brave enough to join up knowing that any time, some random lunatic will go and do something impossibly inane, like start a frelling war. I hate that there are kids out there younger than my baby brother getting blown to bits because they wanted to go to college and thought the Army would be a good way to do it. Bug and I have watched Band of Brothers like, 900 times. We have an autographed photo of "Wild Bill" Guarnere and we're always amazed that in 1941 everyone just signed up. Cause it was the right thing to do. And granted, the kids I encounter at my job are probably crap examples, but to sound like something I never wanted to sound like, I just can't see kids today doing that. I'm not saying my generation would be any better, but...Obviously there are exceptions and thank god for that, but....

entire point of post: There's this really creepy dude, the Reverend Fred Phelps, (warning, his site is just so...I don't know, malevolent, that's it's hard to look at) who apparently goes to the funerals of US soldiers with his creepy little followers, and jeers at the families and friends of the dead because of their belief that U.S. combat deaths are a sign God is punishing the United States for harboring homosexuals.

Holy Shit. I mean, I'm all for people having opinions, really. Especially if I don't have to hear them. But..ahh...these Godly folk have been doing this at the funerals of AIDS victims for some time now. And when those miners died in West Virginia? These freaks were there.

This is why I wish I lived in a shack in the woods. Cause I wouldn't have to know about shit like this and be horrified. That's just..I can't even think of a word. I'm not a real religious person, as you've probably noted in the past, we're more of the "Christmas is Santa's Birthday and Easter is when the Bunny was Born or Created Chocolate or whatever" kind of Christians (agnostic- just in case) but, how sketchy is that?

But you know what rocks? Bikers. Why? Cause they go to the funerals too, for the express purpose of drowning out these freaks and letting the families lay their loved ones to rest without listening to words of hate. While Phelps and his family (I think I might've found something to hate as much as Scientology {screw you, Tom Cruise and the Masterson brothers and why oh why do they get Jason Lee? He's funny, dammit.} sing vulgar and insulting songs and condemn the dead, the bikers chant USA USA USA over and over. I think that's kinda beautiful.

I swear my next post will be totally fluffy and airheady, as usual. But this just pissed me off.

Plea for Assistance

2006-02-12T23:09:00.000-05:00

See bags under eyes? Bloodshot baby blues? Please send QUITTING SMOKING WITHOUT COMMITTING MASS MURDER tips. Thanks!

My Bug is Sweet

2006-02-07T21:53:00.000-05:00

Because my husband is the sweetest he went to pizzeria uno and got me the giant peanut butter cup slathered w/ice cream and whipped cream cream and drizzled with chocolate sauce because I'm so PMSy that I'm ready to get a rifle and get on a tower and start shooting people. Cramps should not occur before the period. It's unjust. And the cell phone postings always get cut off. Bastards.

Mobile Email from a Cingular Wireless Customer http://www.cingular.com

We put a bid on a house. They accepted.

2006-02-07T04:25:00.000-05:00

This is the house. 3 bedrooms, ONE BATHROOM (guess what will be the 1st project upon moving in? That's right, knocking the damned closet upstairs out and making it a half bath) gorgeous wood floors, a big backyard that's all fenced in for the dog (soon to be dogs) to run around in, and- here it is- A WASHER AND DRYER! AND A DISHWASHER! . I shall drape myself across the washer and dryer and weep with joy. I can't go upstairs in Sears because I make a 'scene' around the washers and dryers. The basement is partially finished (3/4) with two big comfy carpeted rooms and a room off the side with MEGA closet space and boilers and hot water heaters and all that other stuff I don't really get. The people who currently own the house have taken AMAZING care of it, and it's gorgeous. It's a wee bit country style, but that'll be easy enough to fix.

By April, I could be writing blog entries from MY HOUSE where MY STUPID EVIL LANDLADY DOTH NOT DWELL!

Mortgage huge, cause to live out here you have to actually pass $100 bills in your stool, and not everyone can do that. Taxes are ludicrous, etc etc. In any other part of the country this would be maybe $85-100,000. Not here. Let's just say that we'll be paying off a huge mortgage for a long time, which will put a severe dent in my shopping- no Anthropologie , no Pin Up Girl clothing , no Sephora , and no zappos and no best candle place on earth.

Wish us luck!!

Long blathering work related exhaustion.

2006-02-03T04:33:00.000-05:00

So I'm off today- was off yesterday too. Went to Foot Doctor Who Doesn't Take My Insurance but Is Only Person I'll Let Near My Feet and found out ankle pain is caused by.......who the hell knows. Likely from one of the anywhere between 10-50 times a day I trip/stumble/bump into/almost fall off of/into the environment. I am without a doubt, one of the most graceful people ever born. Ask anyone who knows me. My patients often ask, after seeing me almost knock something over or slam my hip into the doorknob for the 90th time, "Are you OK?" and I'll reassure them that yes, I'm fine, and you can ask Paul "Saloon" Sanders, one of our regular Protect the Nurses From Harm people and he'll say "yes, she does that all the time. Don't worry."

But back to being off today. I'm so relieved. I love my job, I really do. It's also the only social outlet I have, which I know is deeply the bold word listed here , but alas, is true. But Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday sucked the life out of me in a huge way. There were three really problematic patients, and all of them are genuinely ill, which usually gets them a pass, as opposed to those who are just Annoying Asshats NOS (not otherwise specified) and who don't need to be on my unit when there's people who need to be there waiting for beds.

Anyway, these 2 guys (the 3rd guy I just medicated throughout the night, barely giving him a chance to wake up, which considering the night before he'd jumped over the nursing station and started throwing chairs at 5 AM, was OK with all of the staff) are both really, really sick.

Psychotic. One is religiously fixated, a very common delusion, and is convinced that we're all devil worshippers who are doing evil to him and that Christ doesn't want him to take the medication because it makes him sick. Monday it was heart breaking. 7 hours later, my head was throbbing and I was exhausted from trying to get him to stop screaming and cursing and pacing up and down waving his hands wildly, scaring everyone else. So we had to get STAT IM orders. I will admit that sometimes, yes, I kind of enjoy giving shots. Yeah, I know, I'm evil. But if it's haldol 5 mg for someone who's so floridly psychotic that they're actually touching the walls to feel the voices they're hearing and there's even a chance that the Haldol will knock out the symptoms or let the patient sleep and not be subjected to that misery for a bit, then yeah, I've got no problem. Also the people who've been really nasty and problem causing- inciting chaos on the unit, attacking other patients, screaming and insulting the other patients, I am less than remorseful that I'm the one who gets to jab them 3 times (we can't mix the injections anymore- used to be Haldol 5, Ativan 2 and Cogentin 1 in one needle- no longer) with one of these . Ideally, in a few days, we'll have gotten enough meds in him for him to come down and stop being so manic and agitated and threatening. But sometimes, and I feel bad admitting this, I desperately want to scream "Just Shut The Fuck Up!" which is a Very Bad Thing.

The other one is a Cheeky Devil (read 3rd down) who also starts screaming and flailing arms and then on Monday night SPIT IN THE FACE of Tommy "the Thinker" I can't remember his western name now, but he's a wonderful guy, very calm, and very good with the patients, always treating everyone with the utmost respect. So we had to toss him into seclusion, hold him down while I gave him 3 STAT IMs too. It's just deja vu- seclusion room, patient being held down, it's demeaning for them, it's depressing for us, it makes me feel evil and heartless but it's gotta be done. This kid is just dangerous when he's not medicated. You can ask one of the family members who are terrified of him after he tossed furniture and kitchen knives at them.

Added to my ankle pain and the necessitating of the walking stick( which is totally lame- I want a cool one. Maybe everyone can take up a collection? Mail $5 to my paypal account so I can get the kick ass walking stick? ) and therefore no cute boots, and what I feel is seriously unjustly early PMS unless I'm god forbid pregnant because Merciful Zeus, who the hell am I to be anyone's mother???!!??, I was just ready to cry by about 7 PM and that usually doesn't happen at Sweet Valley Psych, especially when I'm working with a good crew (which I was) and doing meds in my little Foxglove world (that's where the pic below was taken) where I play my CD's and spray my various room sprays , so that the room is heavily scented with something that makes me happy.. So the med room is like my little world, I've got my music, my lovely scents, a paper towel dispenser to reapply my lipstick in the reflection of, and a window into the chart room so I can chat with my lovely coworkers, Stella "the Bullet" Stevens and Theresa "Hellish Devil" Payne, who are my favorites. Amazing nurses, both of them. But even working with them couldn't take away the suck of these past 3 days. Saturday I'm back. And I'm wearing jeans. But I can't wear cute shoes...

And the Ebay links? The best seller ever. The Scented Room . Buy stuff, and tell her Shmeeshmak sent you.

Achey HNT.

2006-02-01T23:04:00.000-05:00

The Ankle of Infamy Strikes Back. Note absence of cute boots. Have been using cane for past 2 days, though since there are psychotic people here, I can only use in med room. Grr Old Age caught up fast. Ow.

Compared to past ones, this must seem pretty dull, huh? Oh well. Go check Osbasso's for details on how to participate...

Oh, by the way, someone I work with asked me "that's just for decoration, right? Not for orthopedic reasons?" So apparently I am eccentric enough that using walking stick without needing it wouldn't be out of character. Huh?

2006-01-28T22:05:00.000-05:00

Behold the Bday Bitch!

If we don't get out of this hellhole apartment soon

2006-01-25T00:09:00.000-05:00

I'm going to start killing people. I loathe our landlady, our ceiling is collapsing, we pay a fortune in fucking renter's insurance and rent and we live in a goddamned dump. Our combined income is over $100K a year and we still cannot afford ANYTHING in this goddamned area. 2 bedroom one bath houses the size of a tiny studio apartment in Manhattan cost like $500,000. See this article for what we're up against.

We are never going to get out of this shithole and I'm so miserable. Bitch landlady won't let us have any more pets. Bitch landlady also won't fix our fucking ceiling or the kitchen drawers that have been broken since JULY 2000.

I can't deal with this. I would rather stay at work then come home to this dump. I want to go on one of those Alaska cruises and never come back to this dump. I want to move to Michigan to live near Aughra. But psych nursing jobs are hard to find, and Bug's company is located in NYC.

I'm angry and sad and irritated and very glad that I don't have a gun right now.

Inspired by Osbasso (again)

2006-01-23T00:46:00.000-05:00

Got me wondering about my "flaws".

The first is that I talk way too damned fast. I have a serious problem shutting up. I also fidget like crazy. Sometimes people think I'm on speed. This tends to irritate people. This also relates to number 2-

which is- I have a really hard time faking being nice to people I can't stand. I can usually pull it off for awhile- I'm a fairly good actress, and am generally pretty easy going, so to annoy the fuck out of me you've got to be pretty bad- but if you get to this point, it's next to impossible for me to even look at you without getting my hackles (metaphorically, people) raised and my blood pressure shooting up.

When you work on a psychiatric ward this can be a problem. 99.96% of my patients I have no problem with. There are a few though that I can't even look at without my skin crawling. One of them (all frequent flyers) is currently on our unit and is constantly at the nursing station calling "Foxglove, Foxglove, Foxglove" in this whiny little tone telling me he needs to have a 1:1 (which is our fancy way of saying conversation) about something. Now, if he hadn't
a. Waited for an attendant to leave the room on another unit and then grabbed a nurse and repeatedly banged her head into a wall because she was getting too close to his sexual issues (gay and in denial)
or
b. Written "I Love Foxglove. I'm a Loser" on his arm in pen and then showed it to me and the rest of the staff and the other 19 patients

I might be more tolerant. But I'm not. He is an attention seeking, whiny little maggot. He is ill, yes, but that's not what makes him annoying. It's his personality of whinging till he gets his way and therefore inspiring ire in all who meet him. We actually fight over who has to chart on him because none of us want to talk to him.

I'm also hugely impatient. I can't get my nails done at the salon because I just can't sit still that long and do nothing. If I'm gonna lay around and do nothing, I'm doing it on my couch where I have a steady supply of cigarettes and the water of the gods near me. Also the dog has to be near me.

I want another dog, and desperately so. There is one I've got my eye on, now that Brownie's been adopted, but if Bug and I do get this dog, my mother and father will go positively apeshit and have threatened to withdraw support in helping us find a house so we can get away from stupid evil landlady. This is the beautiful girl I've got my eye on now. I've been emailing the rescue coordinator, and she said she hopes we adopt her because she knows we'd give her a really good home. And I want to. But our apartment is small. And our landlady is evil. And I'm so miserable about it. Please give advice- she's tiny, she's housebroken, she loves other animals, and she's a mush. And we'd call her Hanne.

As far as bridesmaids dresses go.....

2006-01-19T20:14:00.000-05:00

Why do bridesmaid dresses have to be universally unflattering? I'm a size 12 bust, size 8 waist and size 6 hips? What's wrong with these people ? Is this so other people (bridesmaid designers I guess) don't steal their secrets? WTF?

And the fact that I wish dress was this color should say a lot about actual color...

Oh, and they have to take it in a bunch at the waist. I couldn't hold it in and take picture cause have only got the two arms.

But the dress if for a very special girl, who stood by me when I was a depressed and MEAN bitch in high school, when all my other friends fled. Patsy, from Ab Fab as she used to be blonde (she's a redhead now too), is her nickname and we used to get up to all kinds of trouble. My parents LOVED her though, she could've shown up at the door 9 months pregnant, a crack pipe hanging out of her mouth and a needle in her arm and they would've been all "PATSY!" . Working different schedules- she's a teacher (days), my nursing (evenings) and the fact that Rt 17 and Rt 3 are both involved in visiting each other has seriously cut down on our hanging out. But we're working on that. Sort of. Cause we've been saying that for 5 years now. But I"m the Maid Of Honor (I refuse to be matron on principle) and I have to be a good sport. Her dress, incidentally, is stunning. As soon as I can remember the name of the designer, I'll link to it. Anyway, Bug and I are off to to the mall to return the perfume he ordered for me correctly that they shipped incorrectly. He ordered nutmeg & ginger, and they sent "154". I hate it.

I now smell like old lady. Damnit. But my waist is 25 1/2" with the corset!

Make sure to click on title link- it's always fun to gaze upon hideous bridesmaid dresses.

Late Entry for HNT...

2006-01-19T04:38:00.000-05:00

I can't sleep.

It's all about the camisole and the red hair this week, folks.

For those of you still living in caves and wondering what this mysterious "HNT" is, ? Go here to find out more!

As always, make sure to stop by Aughra's page because she's my best friend ever and I love her to pieces. Plus she's super smart, hot, funny, and slightly pregnant.

Well I did it. Updated

2006-01-14T10:31:00.000-05:00

Brownie got adopted on Christmas Eve. So no new doggie for us. My parents are thrilled, but I"m very disappointed.

I filled out the pre-adoption papers for Brownie, (who'll be renamed Blixa). I can't believe the little guy is still there. I hope he's not an ANGRY DOG. Isaac would love a buddy, and since Isaac has Ceraunophobia and this article suggests that despite our reassurances, he's still going to freak out. But another dog makes him less likely to bug. And I've been wanting Blixa for awhile now....since Mid-November anyway. So today, I'm going to go down and deal with the landlady who makes my blood pressure SHOOT UP REALLY HIGH and essentially beg her to let us get another dog. She won't sign anything (not that you'd be able to read) and she almost never answers the phone (see: deaf and selectively English speaking) -

SO - wish us luck on attaining our new son.

Blixa "Damien" um...Our Last Name, which I'm not listing here.

Plaid Plaid World HNT- And Bra shot got me 65 comments so disprove my No Boobs= < Comments theory, will ya?

2006-01-11T22:05:00.000-05:00

It's that time again folks, where I check and see that without the presence of any bra/breast like area in picture, the number of comments will be decreased by something like 74.56%.

This is Part 2 of the I Don't Want To Be Turning 30 So I Will Dress Like I'm 18 Again series. (It ends soon, don't worry). Usually, Aughra helps me with the collage, but this time it was

Bug who photoshopped and took photos.

What's this HNT thing anyway? Go here to find out more!

Happy HNT!

I want to be multi lingual. Instead, I present this post in Alta Vista BabelFish French, with apologies to all actual French speaking readers.

2006-01-11T04:34:00.000-05:00

Le Formulaire De la Digitale : Là où le babillage aléatoire est entremêlé avec des pensées intelligentes occasionnelles et réel nourrissez les discussions relatives. Et liens aux emplacements où je perds trop d'heure. Merci chacun de la lecture, j'apprécie chaque commentaire.

And now- Birthday begging. I really, really want these. Bug got them for me for Christmas but then I lost one cause I'm a lame ass. Sigh. Also this signet ring because, in case you forgot, I'm a total geek.

But the best gift anyone could give me would be donating money to rescueadopt.com or your local animal shelter. Trust me, they need the money. The power of puppies and kitties compels you!

Classy

2006-01-10T14:43:00.000-05:00

Cause nothing says classy lady like skull earrings

Reasons Being A Nurse Ruins TV and Movies for You

2006-01-09T22:33:00.000-05:00

You just know too damned much. For instance, House was just on, and I totally love this show. Ok, I totally love Hugh Laurie, he was fantastic in Sense & Sensibility (my concession to chick flicks pretty much ends w/ Jane Austen) and has the greatest dry sense of humor ever. That sentence looks weird. Anyway, on House this evening, they played an old episode where someone had rabies , and blah blah, one of the other doctors (or "Cottages" as the world's best website calls them) gets rabies and needs to get the treatment. What's the treatment for rabies? All together, everyone: LOTS OF SHOTS IN THE STOMACH. Only it's not. And that bugs me.

Also- in Identity , there's this one teensy little detail that they could have had some PA look up in 5 seconds to frelling fact check but they didn't. Mental illness diagnoses are divided into axes (not the thing you hit people/trees with) I through IV. The major diagnoses, like Major Depressive Disorder or Schizophrenia are Axis I. Axis II is personality disorders and developmental disorders. Axis III is physical illnesses ,Axis IV is psychosocial stressors, and axis IV is a number from 1-100 that rates the patient's highest level of functioning. Anyone with internet access could look this up on google in like "0.13 seconds" (that's how long it took me to find this ) every time they say "he's diagnosed as Axis IV Dissassociative Identity Disorder I cringe and screech and get all irritable which irritates Bug or whomever else in unfortunate enough to be in the vicinity to hear me go on and on and on about it. Mental illness almost never portrayed accurately. They're not all gun wielding, pushing people in front of trains, cat hoarding, baby raping and eating monsters like Law & Order would have you believe. Russell Crowe did a pretty good job in A Beautiful Mind- it's something with the eyes, hard to explain if you're not "in the trade" but...there's just something about the eyes that enables you to just pick people out in a crowd and know who the long time psych patient is.

Other things that bug Mrs. Bug:
IV machines that aren't on,
the sound effect of a ventilator when the patient's not on one
the fact that people stand in the ICU at the bedside of the patient and talk on their cell phone, which even in MY hospital (1st rule of Sweet Valley Psych- We are Not A Real Hospital - followed by "we don't talk about SVP" ) would get you tackled and your cell phone taken away
people who have just had CPR performed on them the day before doing things that require moving around because
a. it only works like, 15% of the time (but you should still learn it and be certified cause you never know if you're gonna be the 85 or the 15)
and
b. you hurt really bad, cause usually your ribs get cracked.

Also- private rooms? ha ha ha. Not so much. When they show nurseries on tv and people are walking in the hall carrying babies (strictly verboten because people STEAL BABIES and they get like, the metal discs that are on leather jackets attached to their umbilical cords. ) People who work in the hospital don't carry the baby. They push the baby in the little clear plastic...um...cradley thing.

So- informal poll (much like the one I conduct at work by asking my patients who are taking Risperdal M-Tab , which is like Styrofoam texture and dissolves in the mouth (so they can't fake take the pills) what they taste like. General consensus is mint. Sometimes "candy" or "altoids". Rarely, "Good".

Ok, informal poll- are there things about your job/career/interests/something you've got some super level of erudition in that when represented in tv or movies, is always all frelled up?

Also- stating that someone's fashion style is "schizophrenic" is insulting. You'd never hear anyone say "Well, she dresses a little liver cancery, you know?" I fucking hate that.

Working weekends makes me grumpy.

2006-01-08T03:50:00.000-05:00

So I shall summon my minions! (yeah I'm hanging out at that name/minion/pirate ship/other geekatory items generator site. Again. )

Release the regenerating invisible mechanical shrimp that can interface with electronic devices!
Release the radioactive sneaky mice that spew deadly parasites!

Release the super-strong sneaky bears powered by atomic energy!

Release the giant crazed berserk mice that live to destroy!

Release the super-strong stealthy tigers!

Release the giant hateful teleporting psychic mice!

Release the sneaky demonic leopards!

Release the single-minded genetically-engineered mice!

Release the supersonic sneaky assasin cyborg pandas!

Release the super-intelligent vampire housecats that spew deadly parasites!

Obsessed with New Cell Phone

2006-01-06T08:38:00.000-05:00

Because of my ringtones. I have "The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly", and when Bug calls or sends me a message, it plays The Magnificent Seven, and when I get messages from my darling Aughra, , I hear the theme from Deadwood of course (ooh here's one now!) play. At work the nurses have finally gotten used to hearing Deadwood and hearing me say, oh, it's my best girl that if I'm not in the immediate area, when I return they tell me "Aughra sent you another text message."

Hee. Hee. I also have Alice in Chains, Mazzy Star, Fred Weasley from Goblet of Fire, the Ramones (I Wanna Be Your Boyfriend), Johnny Cash (Long Black Veil) and just a teensy bit from Phantom wth Gerry, cause he's just so damned pretty. And...I've seen movie a couple of times. (Ok, I own everything of his you can get on DVD and will probably buy a VHS of a guest appearance on a good BBC Mystery! series that also aired on PBS...Cause I get a little obsessive.)

But it's good to have hobbies, right?

Just a little, right Bug?

2006-01-03T20:17:00.000-05:00

Just had patient who knows exactly what she's saying tell me 'get bent, you fucking cunt' Lovely people at my job really.

Mobile Email from a Cingular Wireless Customer http://www.cingular.com

updated
patient apologized to me last night and actually had tears running down her face. I feel like a jerk. But she and I are "cool" at least as much as we can be when I want her to take her meds and get better and she doesn't want to....

Have you been good lately?

2006-01-02T19:06:00.000-05:00

Nurse Foxglove get's impatient and she's REALLY good at injections...?